Thinking Other Mom's Homes Are Neater Than Yours

Thinking Other Mom's Homes Are Neater Than Yours!

By Jennifer Tankersley

Do you ever visit other moms' homes and wonder how they keep it so neat? Do you ever sit around in your own home with toys strewn over the floor, laundry piles (both clean and dirty) beckoning for attention, and three meals worth of dishes stacked next to the sink and wonder why you are the only mom on the planet who cannot keep up with her home? If you answered yes to either of these questions, then you may be suffering from "TOMHANTY" Syndrome (Thinking Other Moms' Homes Are Neater Than Yours). The symptoms of this terrible disease are guilt, envy, stress, and even withdrawal (did I mention guilt?). You look around as you walk from room to room wondering how it could have gotten so messy since yesterday. You believe that the new friend you just made from your weekly visit to the library could never let her house look like a tornado just went through it. You are sure that your friend whose house you visit occasionally for a scheduled playgroup would never have dust bunnies the size of . . .well, a bunny.

Welcome to the Real Moms Club, where it is not just about being a mom, but being real and knowing that you don't have to be a perfect housekeeper. Maybe in the days of our grandmothers when society said that kids could roam unsupervised and free around town, but a mom's house was a reflection of who she was as a woman. Today, there is a different set of priorities for many moms, and a perfect house is not usually the highest on the list, although we still imagine we are being judged on everything from how we raise our children to how much education we pursue to how great a job we land and finally to how tidy we keep house. Moms of today are stretched and pulled in many directions. Life is rarely as simple as a clean house. Stop telling yourself that you are not a good mom because your house is not always as neat as you think other moms' homes are. Most moms are struggling to keep up as well.

What is the cure to TOMHANTY Syndrome, you ask? Well, you could drop by a friend's house unannounced with the pretext of delivering some home-baked cookies; you could watch her face turn beet red with shame as she turns to survey the wreck of toys, laundry, and dishes behind her; you could listen to her offer up every reason why her house is in such disarray; or maybe you could just take me at my word when I say that you are not alone. Release your guilt by making a list of what you DID accomplish today: got kids dressed, dropped kids off at school and picked kids up after, washed and folded a load of laundry, paid bills, took dog to vet, fed family for the day. It all counts toward making your house a home in which your family can grow and feel loved.

Jennifer Tankersley is the creator of List Mama Blog: Lists of Lists for List-Lovin' Mamas and ListPlanIt.com where you can find 250 lists and planning pages including cleaning schedules, daily to do lists, grocery lists, and holiday/party planning to put your world in order.

Latest Articles...

The Uneducated Palate
When did you learn to really enjoy food? How about experiencing taste and textures? I think children develop a taste for food a lot sooner than we think.

Ways of Dealing With Separation Anxiety
All parents will remember how difficult it was to leave their children when they were young, and some of us had to deal with unhappy children suffering from separation anxiety, again and again and again! Veronica shares some tips on how to make the partings easier.

Healthy food is yucky food
Healthy Food Means Yucky Food
So, you are ready to make some changes in your family's diet. You've heard and read enough to know that eating Real Food is important to your family's health and happiness. You know what your kids eat when they are young not only affects their health now, but also in the future...

5 Reasons Why Animals Are Important To Your Child
Why are children so fond of animals? From teddy bears to favourite TV and cartoon characters, animals are a key part of a young child’s development. Children’s educational specialist Stephanie Cooper has identified 5 key areas where animals play an important role...

No More Helicopter Parenting! 7 Tips To Teach Your Children Self Reliance
It's developmentally appropriate for children to become more and more independent, self reliant and responsible as they age. It can be challenging for parents to know when to step back and let their children try something on their own. This article provides 7 tips to help parents instil self reliance and a sense of responsibility in their children.

What Kind of Lessons Do SuperMoms Teach Their Kids?
A "supermom" is a mother who puts the needs of her family above her own and wants to be that dependable person who volunteers on every school committee. Learn how to shed the supermom cape and free yourself from unwanted stress.

Math Games for the Active Child
To put it in a nice way, my son is rather squirmy. He doesn't like to sit still for very long unless he's playing a video game, then it's just amazing. So instead of constantly telling him to sit down and do his math, we take it outside or up the stairs, literally...

Fit Yummy Mummy Review
As the title suggests, this product is specifically for moms wanting to get fit. Literally all aspects of losing fat and getting fit are covered – and the best part is that it is written specifically for busy moms.