Christmas Jokes

How many ways can you enjoy a good Christmas joke with the kids? Here you can read them online (scroll down the page), print them out for advent calendars or lunch boxes or party games - or just a fun little pick-me-up to find on the breakfast table each morning! We've also got a brand new collection of lovely joke bookmarks which will perk up a reading book nicely...

Christmas Jokes Booklet

Christmas Jokes Booklet

Here's one of our popular mini booklets to print and fold, this one filled with a selection of some of our favourite kid-friendly Christmas jokes! Perfect for tucking into a pocket and pulling out to entertain... You will need our origami booklet instructions.

Christmas Jokes Cards

Christmas Jokes Cards

These little Christmas joke cards are designed to be tucked into home-made Christmas crackers but you can use them in all sorts of ways. Pop them into a lunch box, perhaps? Make a treasure hunt and see who can collect the most. Punch a hole in one corner and use them as an original gift tag?

Christmas Jokes Printable

Christmas Jokes Printable

Here's a selection of some of our favourite Christmas jokes in colourful format. Print it out and share with friends and family for some Christmas giggles!

Christmas Lunch Box Jokes

Christmas Lunch Box Jokes

Our Christmas lunch box notes were one of our most popular Christmas downloads last year. They are such a useful size, quick to slice up, and of course they have endless uses! Tuck them in lunch boxes, obviously. Hand them out as an incentive in class. Hide them for a treasure hunt.

Robin jokes bookmarks

Robin Jokes Bookmarks

These cute little Christmas robin bookmarks are sure to cheer up reading time, and they look lovely peaking out the top of a book! Laminate if you want them to last.

Santa Jokes Bookmarks

Santa Jokes Bookmarks

Spread some Christmas cheer and laughter with these fun little Santa bookmarks complete with jokes. Santa looks great with his head sticking out of a book, too!

Snowman Jokes Bookmarks

Snowman Jokes Bookmarks

These cute winter (or Christmas) bookmarks print four to a page and make a great little hand out in the classroom to encourage reading.

Ideas for using our printable Christmas jokes:

  • Cut them up and use them in a treasure hunt (write clues on the back or just hide them round the room and see who can find the most)
  • Pop them in your own home-made Christmas crackers
  • Parents can use them as Christmas "lunch box notes" for their kids
  • Print them onto card and use them as gift tags
  • Make your own hilarious Christmas board game! Cut the jokes out and put them in stack face-down. Whenever someone lands on a special square, they take a joke and read it out! (Ideas for designing a simple board game)
  • Make a Pass The Parcel game with a joke between each layer.
  • Enjoy them as they are!

Christmas Jokes for Kids

What’s white and goes up?
A confused snowflake!

What do you call an old snowman?

What do you sing at a snowman’s birthday party?
Freeze a jolly good fellow!

What goes: now you see me, now you don’t, now you see me, now you don’t?
A snowman on a zebra crossing!

What goes ho-ho whoosh, ho-ho whoosh?
Santa caught in a revolving door!

What goes “oh, oh, oh”?
Santa walking backwards!

Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Snow who?
Snow use – I’ve forgotten my name again!

Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can ho ho ho!

When does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?
In the dictionary!

What’s the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
The Christmas one has no L (noel)!

What do you have in December that’s not in any other month?
The letter D!

Why is it always cold at Christmas?
Because it’s in Decemberrrr!

What Christmas carol is a favorite of parents?
Silent Night!

What’s impossible to overtake at Christmas?
The three wide men!

Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy!

How does a snowman lose weight?
He waits for the weather to get warmer!

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Frosted flakes!

What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
Can you smell carrot?

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Where do snowmen go to dance?
A snow ball!

How many presents can Santa fit in an empty sack?
Only one, after that it’s not empty any more!

What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?

How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?
Deep and crisp and even!

What carol is heard in the dessert?
Camel ye fathful!

What do monkeys sing at Christmas?
Jungle bells, jungle bells!

What does a cat on the beach have in common with Christmas?
Sandy claws!

What is Santa’s dog called?
Santa Paws!

Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?
Santa Jaws!

What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a detective?
Santa Clues!

What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when the fire is lit?
Crisp Cringle!

What do you call Santa Claus when he doesn’t move?
Santa Pause!

How do sheep greet each other at Christmas?
A merry Christmas to ewe!

What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree?
A pineapple!

What kind of candle burns longer, a red candle or a green candle?
Neither, candles always burn shorter!

Why are turkeys wiser than chickens?
Ever heard of Kentucky Fried Turkey?

What happened to the man who shoplifted a calendar at Christmas?
He got 12 months!

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?

Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters?
They both drop needles!

What often falls at the North Pole but never gets hurt?

What is the best Christmas present in the world?
A broken drum – you can’t beat it!

You might also enjoy:

Christmas tree bookmarks
Christmas Bookmarks

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